July 18, 2012

TV/Film: How Not To… Remake The Inbetweeners

I have no words that can express my disgust and hatred for this trailer and for the idea of remaking The Inbetweeners in the first place. MTV has fucked up massively on this one. Watch and try not to put your fist through your computer screen and then go on a murderous rampage in sheer fury.

Lifestyle: Wankered Wednesdays - The Harpoon

For all you lads that are going whaling on a hot summers night I present to you The Harpoon, bit fruity but just eat the glass once you’ve finished it and no one will doubt your bollocks.
You will need: 1½ oz vodka, ½ oz orange liqueur, ¼ oz lime juice, a dash of cranberry juice and a
slice of lime (if you’re into decorating your drinks… I sincerely hope you’re not)
To prepare: 1. Add the dash of cranberry juice and pour the liquors and lime juice into mixing glass.
2. Shake briskly and pour into martini glass.
3. Add slice of lime to garnish. (Only carry out step 3 if you’re making it for a lady friend or want it to be your last drink on this mortal earth)

Now enjoy your night of whaling with your Harpoon in hand.

July 17, 2012

Music: Song Of The Moment – The XX – Angels

This song is everything you expect and more from The XX, so mellow it makes it makes MOS Chilled seem like DnB Arena. It’s definitely wet my appetite for their new album, see what you think.

Top Five: Best Things About Being Home After Uni

So after graduating the other day I’ve sat back and tried, and I mean really tried, to see the silver lining of the dark stormy cloud of uni blues. I came to the conclusion that, although it is mostly horribly depressing, being home isn’t all bad. So here’s my Top Five reasons that returning home is decent.

5. The Self Stocking Fridge
Gone are the days when you would sleepily stumble to your fridge in the morning and open it only to be greeted by a similarly forlorn sight as above. Back when I was at uni I was forced into eating such twisted concoctions as super noodles, beans and mayo. Or how about salmon, mayo and Tabasco? There was also the horribly dark night when in a drunken stupor I ate completely black chips and mustard. Now however I, and you, are welcomed by carton upon carton of OJ and milk, unlimited slices of ham, more condiments than you could shake a stick at and other assorted delicacies.

The best thing about it all though? It keeps refilling, over and over again. Like, it never stops. Whenever it looks close to depleting the food fairy swoops in and replenishes the shelves allowing you to continue to munch your way into oblivion.

July 16, 2012

Top Blokes: You Want Me To Park That For You?

This video requires very little explaining really, the mans patience and kindness should be commended. And she should have her license revoked. Enjoy.